How I dress- my personal convictions

Romans 12:1-2New International Version (NIV)
Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship. 2 Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.


I was recently reading another blog about a woman choosing to change how she dresses because of her eyes be opened and her heart being convicted about how men view a woman in various types of clothing.
I know this type of story. Over 5 years ago, just before I became pregnant with my first child I felt a similar conviction. I was a teacher in a middle school and it was common for me to wear fitted style dress pants or fitted jeans (on dress down days). My eyes were opened about how men view women. I often would catch my husband noticing women in tight or skimpy clothing. I noticed them too. Their attire drew the attention. Though for me there was not a sexual attractiveness about noticing it. I knew there were already plenty of women who chose their style of dress to help curb the sexual attention of men. The more I thought about it the more I felt convicted about how I dressed. Sure, I thought I looked okay in tight pants but could it be drawing attention that does not honor the God I serve? I was a teacher, in front of numerous pubescent youngsters each day. Could it be that I was being a distraction to their learning by how I dressed? Could I somehow be encouraging lustful thoughts?
I don't consider myself to be particularly beautiful, so why would anyone have any attraction to my outward beauty? Well, men (and boys) do notice. No matter what size or shape or what color hair you have, men notice you.
As a teacher I was in front of students all day. They saw me from the front and the back. If I was talking or if I was writing on the board, their attention was expected to be on me. To think that a young teacher wearing tight jeans or dress pants would not be noticed by students, was just incorrect. No matter how much I would love to believe that I would not draw that kind of attention, it most likely did happen and probably more than I'd like to think possible.
So, what was I going to do about? Summer of 2009 I switched how I dressed. From that day on, every school day I showed up in a skirt- none that hugged my bum. If I went out in public I was in a skirt. It also made me feel more professional. I felt more like a role model and teacher rather than someone who dressed like the students. I am a petite 5'2 and had be occasionally mistaken as a student in the halls. So dressing better had even more benefits.
I became pregnant that fall which worked out well for my wardrobe since many skirts had elastic waists. In May, 6-7 months pregnant, we took a field trip to NYC on a Saturday. That day I wore maternity jeans in front of that small group of students. although I was not fully comfortable with wearing them, they were the best balance of practical and modest that I had for the trip.
It was good for me to "quit cold turkey" in terms of wearing pants in public. Over the years I have made some compromises in my wardrobe. I do occasionally wear capris or knee length shorts. And I have, on occasion run the the store in yoga pants- though I am very self conscious and if I can I wear something to cover my bum (a sweater/cardigan/jacket).
This has been my conviction. I impose it on no one. I don't usually talk about it unless people bring it up... And they do. I have no issue talking about it. And I am glad when they ask me about it since that means they perhaps do not want to make assumptions and/or spread gossip about my clothing.

So how did my husband like my change in wardrobe??
Well, at first he liked how I looked in skirts. Perhaps he liked the more well kept look on me. But over time he would complain that I wasn't wearing something tight fitting in public. This has been a topic of discussion many times for us. I do make the effort to wear form fitted things around the house for him. I realize he is my husband and would like to have some visual tease from ME. So when I can I wear yoga pants and even go braless which makes him smile when he arrives home from work. I have no issues with dressing that way for him. As our girls grow older we will have to make some alterations and find new ways to be good role models and yet good spouses too :)

Overall this change has been good for me. I enjoy wearing skirts most of the time and just feel better in them. I know God desires for me to follow Him, not the world. He does not desire for me to intice men. I know that there will still be men who will lust after women regardless of how they dress but if dressing more modestly will help their hearts be pure when they look at me then I have "helped keep my brother [in christ] from sin." Intentionally dressing to get sexual attention is not God's will. Therefore, I chose not to conform to the ways of this world. I'm not perfect and never will be but my heart is in the right place.



MY Pros to my more modest dress:
1. Professional look
2. Respect more easily attained
3. Less sexual attention from other men
4. More flexibility with weight gain/loss
5. More discussion on the topic
6. Less likely to be distracting to teaching


MY cons:
1. Had to go shopping for clothes (but would have needed to anyway since I became pregnant shortly after)
2. Had to find ways to keep legs warm in winter under skirts without too much static cling!
3. Finding a balance that works and adjusting it as I go

Parenting Hack #1 glow sticks

And God said, "let there be light." And there was light. God saw that the light was good, and He separated the light from the darkness. - Genesis 1:3-4

I like the dollar store for some things. You know, cheap happy birthday/it's a girl balloons, cards, pregnancy/ovulation tests, puzzles, coloring books and glow sticks.
Who wouldn't want glow sticks!? Aren't they cool.
Well they are more than cool. Sure kids think they are cool but as a parent it's beyond cool. It's a sanity saver.
Power outages are not foreign to our area. Our kids have been in and out of "afraid of the dark" stages. Glow sticks can be a great alternative to flashlights(and way cooler!) for kids during evening or nighttime outages. For $1 you could get a glow stick wand or a pack of bracelets/sticks. Depending on your child's age, you would determine if he/she could handle them alone without getting into trouble or it they should be attached high out of reach somewhere in their room.
Both of our kids have been allowed to have one at night. Our kids (age 3 and 4) are reminded that they are not to throw, swing, smash, or break their glow sticks. We first put a couple on the rails on the toddler bed. Then if they left them alone we added a couple more. One night they got to wear them as bracelets to bed. They know that they would have it taken away if they misuse it. So far we haven't needed to take one away.
We have only used them a couple nights- none of which were power outage nights. But it sparked the thought that I should have some stored for a power outage. Our kids would likely be scared and want to be with us during an outage. Generally speaking our kids do not sleep with us in our beds. Occasionally they are allowed on the floor of our room if it's a really rough night (usually that's a sign that they may have ear infections we haven't discovered yet).
I know some parents are co-sleepers. That's fine. Doesn't work for us. We tried it in a king size bed on vacation. They ended up sleeping on the floor. They move all over the place. We also like to keep the bed for mommy and daddy and not let the kids get between us- literally.
So in an effort to keep our bed and room to ourselves this winter, I think glow sticks will be our fun tool to take out for power outages.
What do you think? Will you be adding this to your bag of tools? Do you have other tools you use?